Some days you feel like you're being watched, and that is a feeling that doesn't feel all that good. Someone's looking over your shoulder, watching your every move and waiting for you to slip up - falling on your face. Maybe it's a sign of the usually well-hidden lack of self-esteem that I have, a sign that the cracks are there no matter what kind of veneer I put over the top of them, and that I worry so much about pleasing others that I'm afraid to fail anyone - no matter how much they hurt me in return. OR maybe it's all a sign of me over thinking too much, I do that too, and it leaves me feeling lost and alone without reason. The mind can be a pretty treacherous thing sometimes... Fear is the most difficult of all emotions to deal with, as it resonates into all walks of life.
Yet sometimes, things like fear can summon up other emotions... Things like fear can draw things out of us that we didn't believe possible - strength, passion and even in some very rare cases desire...
Today I have a sense of desire to protect myself, born of a perhaps unreal fear, but a feeling that's lurking in my brain... Images spring to life, but the image that I've created today of Rudh, really screams and shares that feeling of being watched whilst feeling alone all at once...
Would you believe that all these emotions came bubbling to the surface to become art because of one of the smallest pieces in this picture? I must have been harbouring these feelings in my mind, but there is ONE tiny object that brought this to life...
That object is the very pretty, very dainty looking, "Softly Bound" ribbon cuff from Ama - which is available until the 23rd at Tie Me Up by the way. This item could have taken me in all kinds of directions, from something pretty to something overly kinky, but instead it lead me somewhere dark and twisted. I guess it doesn't help that HellBone gave me this awesome Witch's Recluse Chair - from Jian - that looked SO perfect in his DRD Makeshift Refuge!
Now I will admit that although Rudh is being watched in this picture, and things do look a little sinister, I would have had a hard time taking this picture with the shadow of anyone else. There are very few people in SL that have seen my truly vulnerable side, and the man watching me is one of those. Having people like him around make the bad feelings fade into good ones, and I guess - much like taking this photo and writing a blog post - talking here really helps too... Right now that feeling I had when I started has gone, I just hope that it stays well buried and deep within the shadows from now on!
What is she wearing;
Hair: ARGRACE - KOHAKU in Reds
Skin: Glam Affair - Seya in Europa 2
Bruises: antielle - Appetizer Bites & Hickies (No Longer Available)
Ribbon Cuff: Ama - Softly Bound in Infinity (Available until April 23rd at Tie Me Up)
Chair: JIAN - Witch's Recluse Gacha Item in Chair
Set: DRD - Makeshift Refuge