It's that time again, the time when I post a pretty picture before I open up with a rambling rant to clear my head. My blog has always been more of a journal for me than some other blogs out there... I love looking a the fashion blogs myself, always searching them for something new and cute I simply cannot live without, but this place right here has always been a place I can express myself and share what is going on in my crazy mind.
Sometimes I think back on the days when I first started SL, and my first job as a stripper for a guy called Audio, and I wonder how did it all become so dramatic...
So I warn you now, reading on from here could make you go stir crazy as you enter into one of my rambling rants... Details about my outfit can be seen below the rant and I am sorry to bring people into this, but I need to get things off my chest and at least here I won't be getting into any fights lol...
*sighs* OK, where to start?!
Have you ever had one of those days where you wish you could close your eyes, go to sleep and wake up to start the whole thing again? I've been stuck like that for the past couple of weeks and boy do things build to a crescendo fast in SL. I would sleep and wake thinking things will be brighter when in fact the shade of mud colour just seemed to get murkier... There have been times when I just wanted to walk away but that would take me away from my love of tempting SL God fate!
Drama seems to be swirling around me like a lingering bad smell and if it's not one thing it's another... Something bad happens, it gets resolved and automatically another moves in to take it's place. People walk away from things they love, other people hide their true feelings and you end up feeling used and abandoned, but I guess in the long run it's taught me a few simple life rules.
These last few days alone have taught me that although I am the kind of person who will ALWAYS let people into her heart, and will always trust them, I have to resign myself to the fact that some people will walk all over you, take what they want from it and then drop you when they are done.
Adopting family is always going to be a risky business in SL, I won't be adopting anymore children from now on... First I lost daughters and now I lost my son. He left without even talking to me - he left the MC first -which was nothing in comparison to the shocker of him dropping me from his SL completely.Nothing feels so bad - from a SL point of view - as to when you let someone in, someone that knows how badly something had affected you, and they go and do the exact same thing just a few weeks later.
Maybe I made the mistake of following an order of a ranking officer in MC business - apparently the reason he left the MC in the first place - but surely if I'd meant as much to him as he meant to me, then he could have come to talk to me about it rather than avoiding me and talking to others behind my back? Maybe he just wasn't as ready as he thought he was for the kind of family life that Hell and I were giving him? Maybe there was something else I did wrong that he is too scared or selfish to come and talk to me about? Whatever the reason, I am done worrying, done crying and done thinking about it... It's time I moved forward with my SL, time I took control of it again and time to find people that are actually worthy of sharing my SL with me... I don't know if he will read this, but if he does... I do wish you the best in your SL, just remember next time there are people behind the avatars and your actions can and will hurt those around you.
What is she wearing;
Hair: DeLa - Shell in Red 5
Skin: Glam Affair - Candy Skin in America 09 (Past Arcade Item)
Face Wounds: (Right Eye) Corvus - Scarred Face Tattoo, (Left Cheek) Corvus - Cheek Scars
Piercing: Cute Poison - Frosted Piercings (Past Event Item)
Dress: R3VOLT! - Jessica
Bodysuit: Hucci - Circolo Bodysuit in White
Bracelets: deviousMind - Lolita wristWraps in Storm (Past Oh My Gacha Item)
Boots: BAX Boots - Regency Boots in Black Leather
Pose Pole: aDORKable Poses - Strip-a-doodle (No Longer Available!)